You may have tried to win over a girl in your neighborhood who everybody says is a hard-to-get-man -hater. The truth is that no girl doesn't have her good buttons that, when pressed will make her fall in love with you no matter what. It all starts with you. The way you carry yourself, relate to women, talk, walk and many other things will determine if you get that girl or miss the chance. We as men are in many cases enemies of our own. We fail to understand what girls want in the first place and go complaining that they are the ones that are hard to understand. The truth is if we took time to learn what they want, their psychology, their make up; we would win over every 7 out of 10 that we set to date.
1. Girls need warmth and friendliness-Fake it if you have to
One of the most important things with girls is how you appear to them. Are you creepy, interesting, have a sense of humor, boring or outright obnoxious? Depending on how you talk and relate to a girl, they will make a decision whether you are worth a date within the first 30minutes. Girls' nature is such that they cherish being given true and sincere warmth and charm. Il tell you this, it doesn't matter whether you have a Frankenstein's outlook. If you are warm to the girls, they will flock in their droves. Similarly if you are gloomy and moody, they will fly away like rattled pigeons in corn field.
2. The College Football Player Syndrome If you want to check if this is true, take a trip through memory lane when you were in college or even high school. Remember the guy that always seemed to hoard all the girls to himself. Yes, I mean him; that guy that was mostly in the company of not less than 5 girls. Al they had in them is the power to talk to girls in as if they were queens. This guy must have had a sense of humor to boot, coz girls won't just stand a bore, whiny and introverted guy. Well, you will need to practice to radiate warmth and all those around you (in our case subject-girls) will appreciate your company. Before you know it you will be getting laid more times than you can count.-if you don't have what it takes-FAKE IT.
3. Grab Her Attention - Be Creative
Imagine the advertising industry. A newspaper advertisement needs to grab the attention of the reader and fast. The first sentence or title of any advertisement is usually what achieves the goal of attracting the attention of the reader. So many people will run through a news paper without even stopping at the ad if the title does not stand out.
4. Always know that the game is crowded
Similarly, a beautiful gal will have so many requests to date that she has overtime become immune and just pass through them like routine of a machinist in a large production factory. You therefore need to stand out like that ad copy title sentence. I can hear you asking yourself, how do I stand out? One of the most efficient methods that I have that works with girls is to take your time and let her notice you over time.
This is the best strategy if you don't have the guts to rush in with the line" You look familiar, where did we meet?" If it's a deli where you see her everyday, be at your best manners, say thank you, please, pick a cloth when she drops one, go all the way...but say nothing. I mean don't rush anything; let her simmer by herself as she sizes you up. All along maintain a genuine friendliness. What you are doing in this instance is to let her make her own assessments without the feeling of pressure. When the tide is good and you ready, move in ever so carefully, with a line like you know I've noticed you are so dedicated to your work or something... Be creative.
5. Introduce Yourself to Her in A Friendly, Charming Way
The final step to winning that beautiful girl that you have been eyeing is to finally make verbal contact. I have always found it easier to introduce myself when the chick has already become more or less acquainted to my person. What I mean is that I make sure that the girl believes she knows me even before we have talked. This is mostly through her observing me as I play the passive participant. Once these passive acquaintances have been established then you are good and ready to introduce yourself. If you wait too long, she will think you are chicken. And you don't want that.
Next you will next to create a rapport or a conversational relationship. When doing the introductions and as you get to know each other beyond the casual meeting in the elevators, at the mall or at the college halls; you will need to maintain your friendliness and warmth. Always remember that a girl is mostly interested in how you say things and not what you say. Give your sentences that affectionate and yes emotional tone. I know for a hardcore, street brawler kind of a man, this sound like expecting a gust of storm in hell but you are the one chasing my friend, you either do it or forget winning her.
You can read more on how to get a girl in bed in days and win the hard to get chicks. If you want to learn some of the real-life tested dating techniques from one of the most respected dating expert on Oprah and other TV Shows, follow the links included in my bio below.
About the Author
Robert is a dating counselor and expert with books on dating in the market. To read more on how you can improve your dating skills and {a target="_new"href=" http://how-to-get-a-girl.blogspot.com/"} GET THAT GORGEOUS GIRL YOU ALWAYS WANTED subscribe to a free Dating course or download a one time HOW TO BECOME A COOL WOMEN PLAYER DUDE IN A WEEK
Wednesday, November 7, 2007
How to Approach Women
Indisputably, the biggest problem that faces the new pick-up artist is anxiety that comes from approaching a woman he desires. There have been quite a few explanations for this, ranging from tribal history that has been implanted in our genes, to societal programming on what is right and wrong for us to do.
Put simply, we just happen to desire social acceptance more than anything else that does not physically keep us alive. We want our family to be proud of us, our friends and acquaintances to respect and include us, and the rest of the world to desire us.
What's the opposite of acceptance? Rejection. And that's what we're afraid of.
I'm going to give you some powerful techniques to eradicate this fear's hold on your life, but before that, I want to discuss the root of this in depth for you.
We're going to call a girl or group not being interested as something other than "rejection" or "getting rejected." After all, you didn't get rejected. Your approach did. If you went in differently, the reaction would have been different. We're going to call it "getting blown out" or a "blow-out." This is because while the set didn't know enough about you to reject you personally, they did express that they wanted to end the interaction.
Your use of words is very important. A good friend of mine is fond of saying, "The first set of the night is always murder." Now if you're equating talking to a girl with someone ending your life, of course you will be more than a little hesitant to make that first approach! Anthony Robbins has set up a whole system on how to use your word choice to better your life. I won't get into it here, but in short, minimize your negative word usage, especially if you're describing something that's necessary for you. If you say "Going to the gym is a royal pain in the ass," you probably won't make it there very often. However, if you say "Getting to the gym consistently is a challenge," it's a lot more likely you'll rise to the occasion. So to sum up, I NEVER want to hear you say "I got rejected."
While word choice is important, a bigger issue that holds the outcome of the set. In other words, you are giving two girls thirty seconds to give a full evaluation of your value as a person and judge you accordingly. That's a lot of power to give someone you've never met before.
There's only three reasons an approach might not go well for me:
1) My game wasn't good enough at this point to handle this particular situation
2) My game was good enough, but I made a mistake in this particular situation
3) There were extenuating circumstances that prevented success, despite that I ran a good set.
That's it. There are no possibilities for why it can go wrong.
In my years in the game, I've met plenty of people that make their living teaching men how to pick-up women. These men pick-up beautiful women right in front of their students, sometimes on video-tape. Some of these guys, if you saw them, would blow your mind because they are not attractive by any standards. They have huge guts, often are balding, sometimes pasty white, and sometimes pretty short and frail. This is a hard thing to accept until you're actually seen this, but you definitely do not need to be good looking to attract women. The point I'm trying to make is:
YOUR LOOKS ARE NOT WHAT GETS YOU BLOWN OUT.
Your game is the problem; not your looks, not your value. It's completely dependent on your social skill-set.
When Tyler Durden makes an approach that doesn't go well (which does happen even for the masters), he says it affects him as emotionally as if he was shooting hoops and had his hand crooked on the basketball and missed.
So you have basically three options to consider. You may have been socially miscalibrated and messed up a set you could have done well. So you learn from your mistake. It also might have been a too difficult set for you to win at this point in your learning curve. You still get mad props for going for it and you are no doubt better because you did go for it. The people that get great at pick-up constantly approach sets out of their comfort zones, where instant success is unlikely. It might be a go-go dancer swinging around a pole. It may be a beautiful girl surrounded by 7 guys. It may be a celebrity. When you're higher in your learning curve, you'll be able to own that set.
Until then, it's only practice.
A great PUA named Hoobie once said that "Every failure is a brick in my palace." I would change that to "Every approach is a brick in my palace." The latter is more accurate, because every attempt you make at a pickup, it adds to your cumulative experience.
And of course there are situations where the set-up is precarious at best and it is near impossible to actually win the set. If a group of girls are having a girl's night out for a friend who's husband just cheated on her, they're going to be giving her 100% of their attention and putting guys to the side for the night. There's no way you would ever know that, so just be open to the possibility. This is not to say you should excuse yourself every time a set doesn't go well. You can't always say "She must have been married." You still have personal accountability. Just let the possibility that it was an impossible set be open in the back of your mind.
Now here are some specific techniques for consistently getting approaches done each night:
· Make it a MUST that you approach a minimum of 6 sets for the night. That you literally can't leave til you do it. Make it your goal to get blown out 6 times. Yes, no numbers, no lays, just get blown out. That way when you get blown out you're closer to your goal.
· If you have a wing, give him 100 dollars. Have him give you 10 dollars back for each approach you do. At the end of the night, he keeps the leftover cash.
· Make it a point to say some outrageous stuff in approaches, stuff you KNOW won't work. Every third approach or so, I will sometimes use a "fun" approach that I don't' expect to work like going up to a group of girls and saying "Are you ready for the big time?"
· A good exercise from Ross Jeffries is to go to a place like a shopping mall or busy street downtown and stop a girl and say "Excuse me, forgive the interruption. I'm Manny Martian. What is your favorite flavored bowling ball?" Now that's not a pickup attempt, because you were not trying to seduce her. Go do that about 20 times and it should be easier. It may be better to do that one in a major city an hour or so away from where you live for that one.
You have to go BEYOND what a typical approach is before you feel comfortable with a normal approach. Once you say something ridiculous and realize you're still alive and breathing afterwards, you can laugh it off and it's a heck of a lot easier to ask a couple women what their opinion is on something.
· FOR NEWBIES ONLY: When you approach, touch the girls before you start talking. Like tap a shoulder. That instigates the "point of no return" signal that let's you know you're already in the interaction. When you see a set, go 3-2-1, TAP, and then they're looking at you and you have to speak. After doing this for a few weeks though, quickly phase it out since it is NOT solid game for a proper pickup.
· Practice seeing women for as they are and not as the demi-gods we make them out to be in the field. If you see a woman in sexy bitch boots, sparkling eye shadow, and shimmering lipstick, of course all you can think of how absolutely wonderful it would be to kiss her. Now look at her and in your head take the lipstick off, as well as the rest of the make-up, and think of how she looks on laundry day. You don't have to imagine her ugly, but just a bit plainer. That should take it down a notch.
· Lastly, be social in general with women of all shapes and sizes. The more often you talk to women outside of a pick-up session, the more natural it will be to start a conversation with any girl at a bar. Talk to fat, older and unattractive women as well.
You may always feel some jitters your first set of the night, and I know pros who feel that way after 10 years of picking up the most beautiful women. They just plow through despite the initial unpleasant feeling. And thats what a real man does: act in spite of fear, and act in spite of discomfort.
About the Author
satyanarayana
http://godownloads.net/
Put simply, we just happen to desire social acceptance more than anything else that does not physically keep us alive. We want our family to be proud of us, our friends and acquaintances to respect and include us, and the rest of the world to desire us.
What's the opposite of acceptance? Rejection. And that's what we're afraid of.
I'm going to give you some powerful techniques to eradicate this fear's hold on your life, but before that, I want to discuss the root of this in depth for you.
We're going to call a girl or group not being interested as something other than "rejection" or "getting rejected." After all, you didn't get rejected. Your approach did. If you went in differently, the reaction would have been different. We're going to call it "getting blown out" or a "blow-out." This is because while the set didn't know enough about you to reject you personally, they did express that they wanted to end the interaction.
Your use of words is very important. A good friend of mine is fond of saying, "The first set of the night is always murder." Now if you're equating talking to a girl with someone ending your life, of course you will be more than a little hesitant to make that first approach! Anthony Robbins has set up a whole system on how to use your word choice to better your life. I won't get into it here, but in short, minimize your negative word usage, especially if you're describing something that's necessary for you. If you say "Going to the gym is a royal pain in the ass," you probably won't make it there very often. However, if you say "Getting to the gym consistently is a challenge," it's a lot more likely you'll rise to the occasion. So to sum up, I NEVER want to hear you say "I got rejected."
While word choice is important, a bigger issue that holds the outcome of the set. In other words, you are giving two girls thirty seconds to give a full evaluation of your value as a person and judge you accordingly. That's a lot of power to give someone you've never met before.
There's only three reasons an approach might not go well for me:
1) My game wasn't good enough at this point to handle this particular situation
2) My game was good enough, but I made a mistake in this particular situation
3) There were extenuating circumstances that prevented success, despite that I ran a good set.
That's it. There are no possibilities for why it can go wrong.
In my years in the game, I've met plenty of people that make their living teaching men how to pick-up women. These men pick-up beautiful women right in front of their students, sometimes on video-tape. Some of these guys, if you saw them, would blow your mind because they are not attractive by any standards. They have huge guts, often are balding, sometimes pasty white, and sometimes pretty short and frail. This is a hard thing to accept until you're actually seen this, but you definitely do not need to be good looking to attract women. The point I'm trying to make is:
YOUR LOOKS ARE NOT WHAT GETS YOU BLOWN OUT.
Your game is the problem; not your looks, not your value. It's completely dependent on your social skill-set.
When Tyler Durden makes an approach that doesn't go well (which does happen even for the masters), he says it affects him as emotionally as if he was shooting hoops and had his hand crooked on the basketball and missed.
So you have basically three options to consider. You may have been socially miscalibrated and messed up a set you could have done well. So you learn from your mistake. It also might have been a too difficult set for you to win at this point in your learning curve. You still get mad props for going for it and you are no doubt better because you did go for it. The people that get great at pick-up constantly approach sets out of their comfort zones, where instant success is unlikely. It might be a go-go dancer swinging around a pole. It may be a beautiful girl surrounded by 7 guys. It may be a celebrity. When you're higher in your learning curve, you'll be able to own that set.
Until then, it's only practice.
A great PUA named Hoobie once said that "Every failure is a brick in my palace." I would change that to "Every approach is a brick in my palace." The latter is more accurate, because every attempt you make at a pickup, it adds to your cumulative experience.
And of course there are situations where the set-up is precarious at best and it is near impossible to actually win the set. If a group of girls are having a girl's night out for a friend who's husband just cheated on her, they're going to be giving her 100% of their attention and putting guys to the side for the night. There's no way you would ever know that, so just be open to the possibility. This is not to say you should excuse yourself every time a set doesn't go well. You can't always say "She must have been married." You still have personal accountability. Just let the possibility that it was an impossible set be open in the back of your mind.
Now here are some specific techniques for consistently getting approaches done each night:
· Make it a MUST that you approach a minimum of 6 sets for the night. That you literally can't leave til you do it. Make it your goal to get blown out 6 times. Yes, no numbers, no lays, just get blown out. That way when you get blown out you're closer to your goal.
· If you have a wing, give him 100 dollars. Have him give you 10 dollars back for each approach you do. At the end of the night, he keeps the leftover cash.
· Make it a point to say some outrageous stuff in approaches, stuff you KNOW won't work. Every third approach or so, I will sometimes use a "fun" approach that I don't' expect to work like going up to a group of girls and saying "Are you ready for the big time?"
· A good exercise from Ross Jeffries is to go to a place like a shopping mall or busy street downtown and stop a girl and say "Excuse me, forgive the interruption. I'm Manny Martian. What is your favorite flavored bowling ball?" Now that's not a pickup attempt, because you were not trying to seduce her. Go do that about 20 times and it should be easier. It may be better to do that one in a major city an hour or so away from where you live for that one.
You have to go BEYOND what a typical approach is before you feel comfortable with a normal approach. Once you say something ridiculous and realize you're still alive and breathing afterwards, you can laugh it off and it's a heck of a lot easier to ask a couple women what their opinion is on something.
· FOR NEWBIES ONLY: When you approach, touch the girls before you start talking. Like tap a shoulder. That instigates the "point of no return" signal that let's you know you're already in the interaction. When you see a set, go 3-2-1, TAP, and then they're looking at you and you have to speak. After doing this for a few weeks though, quickly phase it out since it is NOT solid game for a proper pickup.
· Practice seeing women for as they are and not as the demi-gods we make them out to be in the field. If you see a woman in sexy bitch boots, sparkling eye shadow, and shimmering lipstick, of course all you can think of how absolutely wonderful it would be to kiss her. Now look at her and in your head take the lipstick off, as well as the rest of the make-up, and think of how she looks on laundry day. You don't have to imagine her ugly, but just a bit plainer. That should take it down a notch.
· Lastly, be social in general with women of all shapes and sizes. The more often you talk to women outside of a pick-up session, the more natural it will be to start a conversation with any girl at a bar. Talk to fat, older and unattractive women as well.
You may always feel some jitters your first set of the night, and I know pros who feel that way after 10 years of picking up the most beautiful women. They just plow through despite the initial unpleasant feeling. And thats what a real man does: act in spite of fear, and act in spite of discomfort.
About the Author
satyanarayana
http://godownloads.net/
27 ways to get the heart of girls
Dating with a woman can be very interesting and exciting. Let's say that you met a woman for some time and you really like her and have a great time with her. You are very proud with your conquered because she is beautiful, smart and interesting but you feel that you need to do something to make your relationship stronger. All you have to do is to win her heart.
You will see that after you win her heart this beautiful lady will be only for you and you wouldn't be worry to get dumped too early. But wining her heart is not an easy thing; it takes time, patience and also a little luck.
You don't know how to do it? Here are some useful things that show you how to behave in order to get her heart.
1.first and the most important is to prove her that you really love her; this doesn't mean that you have to kiss her all the time, it is very important to talk with her, ask about herself, to see that you care about her
2.give her the attention she deserves, always be nice to her and pay attention to her as much as she needs;
3.be natural and sincere; arrange to be alone with her and tell her what you feel
4.romantic dinners are always a sure thing to impress, but be creative and take her to a place she has never been before, something special, to never forget
5.make her feel special and compliment her, women love this
6.make her laugh a lot in order to have a great time with you, they don't like guys which make them feel bored
7.Surprise her with cooking for her; you haven't done this before? no problem, she will be excited to see that you do this sacrifice for her;
8.be interesting and choose unusual things to do together, some fun is always welcome
9.let her know that you desire her in the way you look at her and touch her
10.don't push it, if she says no, accept that
11.be a gentleman and respect her, show her that she is special and unique
12.be a good listener; when she is upset about something, ask her what is wrong, help her to get over it and tell her that it wasn't necessarily her fault
13.if she ask you for an advice, always be there for her and help if you can by giving her the advice which she is waiting for
14.women are really emotional so you can win her heart with romance; the key of romance is spontaneity;
15.you need to be inventive so she will never figure out what you plan, because if she can predict your next move your gestures will loose all the effect
16.impress her family and friends, especially her mother, she may have a big influence on her daughter choices
17.be a challenge; women love challenges, but don' t be inaccessible
18.don't cheat on her; this will definitely mean that you will lose her; if you want to win her heart you have to show her that she is the only girl for you
19.call her in the middle of the night to see if she is sleeping; it is a sign that you care and you are thinking at her even night
20.try to not use a foul language in presence of a woman and always excuse yourself if you just said a stupid thing
21.be a good guy, understanding, clean and well dressed
22.pay attention to her even in front of your friends, if she calls you when you are with your friends show the same interest in her, don't be rude
23.recognize the small things, men often don't do this, but this usually mean most
24.sometimes you may tease her about her clothes or jewelries and when she starts too, respond with funny things
25.give her some space; let her spend some time with her family and friends as much as she needs, to not feel like a prisoner in this relationship
26.to not say that you are desperate, call her in some day to compliment her, and after that don't give her any signs about two days, she will wonder if you are ok, so she will be thinking of you
27.also you may show her that you are special too, so she will savoring every minute spend with you
Many relationships fail because after a while this is getting boring. In these days women love and need man as much as before, but they are looking for a relationship in which their emotional needs are met as well. But if you are able to win her heart and make your relationship always be interesting and funny, you will see that this will last for much time.
You will see that after you win her heart this beautiful lady will be only for you and you wouldn't be worry to get dumped too early. But wining her heart is not an easy thing; it takes time, patience and also a little luck.
You don't know how to do it? Here are some useful things that show you how to behave in order to get her heart.
1.first and the most important is to prove her that you really love her; this doesn't mean that you have to kiss her all the time, it is very important to talk with her, ask about herself, to see that you care about her
2.give her the attention she deserves, always be nice to her and pay attention to her as much as she needs;
3.be natural and sincere; arrange to be alone with her and tell her what you feel
4.romantic dinners are always a sure thing to impress, but be creative and take her to a place she has never been before, something special, to never forget
5.make her feel special and compliment her, women love this
6.make her laugh a lot in order to have a great time with you, they don't like guys which make them feel bored
7.Surprise her with cooking for her; you haven't done this before? no problem, she will be excited to see that you do this sacrifice for her;
8.be interesting and choose unusual things to do together, some fun is always welcome
9.let her know that you desire her in the way you look at her and touch her
10.don't push it, if she says no, accept that
11.be a gentleman and respect her, show her that she is special and unique
12.be a good listener; when she is upset about something, ask her what is wrong, help her to get over it and tell her that it wasn't necessarily her fault
13.if she ask you for an advice, always be there for her and help if you can by giving her the advice which she is waiting for
14.women are really emotional so you can win her heart with romance; the key of romance is spontaneity;
15.you need to be inventive so she will never figure out what you plan, because if she can predict your next move your gestures will loose all the effect
16.impress her family and friends, especially her mother, she may have a big influence on her daughter choices
17.be a challenge; women love challenges, but don' t be inaccessible
18.don't cheat on her; this will definitely mean that you will lose her; if you want to win her heart you have to show her that she is the only girl for you
19.call her in the middle of the night to see if she is sleeping; it is a sign that you care and you are thinking at her even night
20.try to not use a foul language in presence of a woman and always excuse yourself if you just said a stupid thing
21.be a good guy, understanding, clean and well dressed
22.pay attention to her even in front of your friends, if she calls you when you are with your friends show the same interest in her, don't be rude
23.recognize the small things, men often don't do this, but this usually mean most
24.sometimes you may tease her about her clothes or jewelries and when she starts too, respond with funny things
25.give her some space; let her spend some time with her family and friends as much as she needs, to not feel like a prisoner in this relationship
26.to not say that you are desperate, call her in some day to compliment her, and after that don't give her any signs about two days, she will wonder if you are ok, so she will be thinking of you
27.also you may show her that you are special too, so she will savoring every minute spend with you
Many relationships fail because after a while this is getting boring. In these days women love and need man as much as before, but they are looking for a relationship in which their emotional needs are met as well. But if you are able to win her heart and make your relationship always be interesting and funny, you will see that this will last for much time.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)